When one brewery with an elf mascot can make an entire mountain town great (TOMMYKNOCKERS BREWERY IN IDAHO SPRINGS)

18 Jun

Tommyknockers in Idaho Springs is about a 25-30 minute drive into the “mountains” from the Denver Metro area, and this brewery is definitely worth the trip.

When we went on Thursday night, they had over 15 different types of beer to choose from, including their three seasonal ales.

So many beers!

After I exclaimed in delight over the fact that Idaho Springs was like a little town (with stores and everything! As you can see, I don’t leave the metro area very often) we entered the brewery.

The front room has coolers where you can purchase your favorite beers to take home with you, along with Tommyknocker merchandise, like hoodies, stickers, and um… uh… we mostly only saw the beer.

*In the “brewery’ part of the restaurant there were those large silver things that are used to make beer, we’re going to call them vats from now on. –Lisa

Lisa and I ordered the beer sampler, which consisted of 10 5 oz. beer samples, and was only $15, a very solid investment for the night.

Boobs and Beer (Please note the artful photography)

The atmosphere at Tommyknockers is very laid back, and they offer a varied and delicious selection of food. We had the nachos for an appetizer, and our meal choices ranged from a buffalo burrito, to a chicken sandwich to a traditional burger to make your own macaroni and cheese – very classy.

We watched Game 7 of the NBA Finals (boo, Lakers!) on the several big-screen TVs in the bar and did a fair amount of people watching. We took secret pictures of babies (because I think it’s weird when people bring babies to bars), stalked the group of firefighters that were there eating (but didn’t get any secret pictures unfortunately, just stared a little TOO long as we slowly…walked…by…)

We only hoped that the man wearing the Celtics jersey wouldn't throw the baby at the television in a fit of rage

And then, the crowning achievement of secret pictures of the night came along.

“I’m TOTALLY going to get the ladies tonight.” (he actually said this seriously)

Yes, that is in fact a mullet, with lines shaved in the side of his head. We attempted to take secret pictures, got caught, and tried to play it off. The guy seemed disappointed that we weren’t taking his picture, so I asked if I could take one with him, as though he was a celebrity.

If only he had also been wearing parachute pants

Now, on to the beer reviews and the boobs. Following is a list of all the beers we tried, along with our boob ratings and running commentary. Thanks to Mandy for helping us out as a Guest Boob this week!

We’ll even forgive you for ordering a martini after all the beer tasting was done.

Alpine Glacier Lager- This beer is average. It has a very watery taste. The best thing that can be said about it is that it’s a slightly classier Keystone Light which having lived only miles from the Coors brewery for most of both of our lives just the thought of “Coors that didn’t make the cut” really wasn’t that impressive to us.

1 Boob

TundraBeary Ale- This was a favorite of all of the girls. It has a sweet berry flavor, but isn’t too overwhelming. If you want a beer that doesn’t taste like a beer but also doesn’t make you look like a “Mike’s Hard Lemonade” kind of girl, this is the way to go.

Lisa: “I like it,”

Julia: “Me too. Let’s drink the rest.”
(First beer gone off the sample)

4 Boobs

Maple Nut Brown Ale- The beer lives up to its name, as it has a sweet and nutty taste to it.

Lisa: “It’s very nutty.”

Julia: “Really? I think it tastes like candy.”

Lisa: “I don’t like candy. I only like pixie sticks. This isn’t pixie sticks.”

J- 4 boobs

L- 2 boobs

Black Powder Stout- This stout has a very smooth and dark flavor. It tastes like chocolate and beer.

Julia: “This is too smooth. It’s not right.”

L- 3 boobs

J- 2 boobs

Butt Head- This was another average beer. It was darker tasting than the previous ones (besides the stout), and the aftertaste hits pretty hard.

*Sidenote, I just realized that maybe that’s why the beer is called Butthead. It’s like that guy you date who seems pretty cool at first, then ends up being a douche.

L- 3 boobs

J- 2 boobs

Jack Whacker Wheat- This was a lighter beer and lives up to other wheat beers we’ve tried. It had hints of lemon, and was served with a lemon on the side.

Julia: “I’m reluctantly giving this beer a 4 boob rating. But I would describe it like this– Have you ever been to a party and been cornered in the kitchen by a guy you don’t really want to talk to? And so you reluctantly let him make out with you so he’ll leave you alone? That’s how I feel about this beer. It’s there, so you drink it, and it’s pretty good, because it’s beer, but you only drink it so you can move on to other beers.”

4 Boobs*

*This was also the beer that caused quite a discussion about our rating system. I wanted to give it 3 and a half boobs, but Lisa yelled at me, “No half-boobs allowed!” I reluctantly upped my rating to 4 boobs.

Ornery Amber- This was another smooth beer, with a bit of a kick. The aftertaste took a while to set in, and wasn’t great. Overall up to this point, boo aftertaste.

J- 3 boobs

L- 2 boobs

Pick Axe- This was another sweet beer, and was terrible when sipping it during the meal. As far as Ale’s go this was a pretty good match for anything regular Ale’s have.

*Don’t expect us to use fancy beer terminology like “hoppy” or “malty”. This was an Ale that tasted like an Ale. I even had to Google “beer terminology” just to come up with “hoppy” and “malty”. –Lisa

J- 2 boobs

L- 3 boobs

 

Rye Porter- This was another smooth porter, but the difference was that this one had more of a coffee flavor than the first. There was also more bite to the aftertaste.

J- 4 boobs

L- 3 boobs

Seasonal Hop Strike IPA

Enough said.

 L- 3 boobs

J- 2 boobs

And so ends the 10 beer sampler of beers. Luckily for us, we brought a “male” (mostly to drive us to the mountains) but were also lucky enough to have him order/convinced him to order two other beers from the menu that weren’t include in the regular sampler of beers. Hooray for us, more beer!

Imperial Nut Brown – Really the only thing that was said about this beer was “You would like this” to the male friend. Overall girls (as if any girls would ever want to read this blog), steer clear of this one, you won’t find any berry taste hidden beneath this beer (which was darker than the murderous expression on Kobe’s face every time the Lakers were down).

2 Boobs

 

Oaked Butthead- this had the highest alcohol content of all the beers at 9.4%. It had a very smoked, woody taste.

“It’s like I’m drinking at Home Depot. And not just any part of Home Depot, but specifically the lumber aisle.”

J- 2 boobs

L- 3 boobs

 

Top Boob Picks

 

Julia

  1. TundraBeary
  2. Maple Nut
  3. Rye Porter

 

Lisa

  1. Jackwhacker
  2. TundraBeary
  3. PickAxe

 

Mandy

  1. Pickaxe
  2. Jackwhacker
  3. TundraBeary

 As you can see, we had pretty similar tastes. Overall, Tommyknockers is a great brewery to visit, even if they don’t have tours (yet). On their website they have their whole menu and also daily coupons and specials, so don’t forget to check that out before you go!

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3 Responses to “When one brewery with an elf mascot can make an entire mountain town great (TOMMYKNOCKERS BREWERY IN IDAHO SPRINGS)”

  1. Stan February 9, 2011 at 11:24 am #

    Your descriptions of the beverages and the breweries are absolutely hilarious! Awesome stuff!

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